


CRACK! "SHE-TICK vs GERBIL MPREG" teh story

by fannishliss



Category: Supernatural, The Tick - All Media Types
Genre: Gen, Gender or Sex Swap, transformed into animal
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-10-14
Updated: 2013-10-14
Packaged: 2017-12-28 17:58:36
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 784
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/994856
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fannishliss/pseuds/fannishliss





	CRACK! "SHE-TICK vs GERBIL MPREG" teh story

My flisters, you thought this was a story before -- and now it is!  apologies to everyone. :)  
  
CRACK.  769 words.  Mpreg!!  rated G.  :)  
 

Like some savage god or deposed tyrant, the She-Tick stared out over the City she was sworn to stare out over.Looked like Vancouver, she thought absently, as her electric blue tresses danced in the wind about her mighty spandex-clad frame.

As she scanned for crime with all of her mighty senses, she detected tiny, high pitched cries of distress.At least, it seemed like distress to the She –Tick, since that was what she was most accustomed to.

“The City has a problem,” she intoned in her impressive contralto. “A rodent problem.And it’s up to me to stop it!”

With a cry reminiscent of Xena (or perhaps Thundarr) the Savage She-Tick catapulted her muscled, nigh invulnerable body into the void between skyscrapers.(THIS City had plenty of skyscrapers, whether it was Vancouver or not!)

The She-Tick’s really good hearing honed in on the tiny cries of eensie little animals, and she soon found them, all in a wad, enclosed in some type of aquarium.

“ _Eensie little guys, enclosed in some type of aquarium,”_ she muttered to herself, in italics. 

“It’s a GERBILARIUM, you ignorant behemoth!”cried a shadowy figure in a lab coat.

“What witchery is this?”the She-Tick predictably responded in her dulcet yet booming tones.

“It’s not witchery, IT’S SCIENCE,”the lab-coated figure responded, and struck a pose.

“Here comes the explanatory monologue--” the She-Tick muttered as she looked around for things she could either heave, bend, or mutilate during the battle which would soon, inevitably, ensue.

“I,”the evil scientist, for she could be nothing less, paused dramatically, “am the Rat Queen!”

“Rat Queen?Is that all you could come up with?”the She-Tick retorted.

“Come on! It’s a classic re-gendering of an obscure old world legend! and I had TIME CONSTRAINTS!”the Rat Queen rapidly hissed.

“Oh, okay, then.Get on with it!”

“Ahem – I am the RAT QUEEN! I shall ensnare you in my GORDIAN KNOT OF RATS!”She paused to pose and smile wickedly, her green eyes flashing behind dorky black specs. The She –Tick also noted that the Rat Queen had an Abundance of Auburn Locks precariously pinned back and held in place by a single mechanical pencil.

The She-Tick peered into the tank.“Those look more like Gerbils to me, actually.What, did you think you’d gotten two “brothers” and five months later, a litter suddenly appeared?”The She-Tick smirked at the lameness of the all-too-common scenario.“That’s not evil!That’s just carelessness!!”

The Rat Queen flashed her eyes.“First of all, Gerbils ARE rats, Mongolian desert rats and they are TINY CLAWED WARRIORS.I shall raise them to do my bidding and you shall FEAR MY RATS!!”

The She-Tick then noticed that the two adult gerbils were doing a complicated maneuver, one standing on the other’s shoulders trying to get the lid off their tank.Looking more closely, she noticed something even more astonishing.

The two gerbils had gnawed a message into the side of their plastic exercise wheel: “NOT GERBILS MEN”---- WHAT COULD IT MEAN?

As the She –Tick stood momentarily agog, the Rat Queen seized an insidious device from the lab table behind her and aimed it at the She-Tick.

“You’re wrong about one MORE thing,”she expounded.“I didn’t make a mistake with two brothers!I TURNED TWO ACTUAL BROTHERS INTO GERBIL MATES!!!”

“You’re MAD!”the She-Tick obligingly responded.

“Why thank you, it’s so nice of you to say so!”the Rat Queen answered, coloring shyly.

“But...YOU’RE NEXT!”

The Rat Queen made as if to fire a transmogrifying ray at the She-Tick, but the mighty heroine gave a sinuous bound – not only did she deflect the dastardly device, she deftly snatched it from the grasp of the sinister scientist.

“CURSES!” shrieked the Rat Queen.

The She-Tick made short work of tying up the now defenseless Rat Queen, and soon she had reversed the device on the two adult gerbils in the cage.Now, two hunky guys stood scantily clad in the Rat Queen’s spare Monday and Thursday lab coats.

“Dean!” hissed the taller one.“I swear, if you don’t show a little more taste in women!”

“Ah come on, Sammy!I thought you’d like her!All brainy and gorgeous behind her frumpy scientist getup!”

“Haven’t you boys learned yet NOT TO OBJECTIFY WOMEN?”The She-Tick and the Rat Queen scolded in unison, then turned toward each other, amused.“Ink pink stink” they intoned, shaking pinkies on it, while the Winchester brothers, still concerned about their tiny gerbil offspring, wondered why this shit always happened to them.

~*0*~


End file.
